July Fourth – The Night Of Sparkler Pussy, The Bringer Of Patriotism

July Fourth is America’s birthday. And every year we have to show how much we love this place by getting drunk, eating cheeseburgers and hot dogs, and setting shit on fire. Well, I have a little story about this year when my friend decided to become the new American hero. Sparkler Pussy.

So, everyone has heard my story about whipped cream pussy. And my friends can’t help but laugh their asses off every single time they hear about it. But, they wanted to top it with something even better. Something more hot and crazy.

I was having all my friends over for a little barbecue and beer. And we all want to have a good time so we get a big ass package of fireworks for the night. And everyone shows up to my house in their best red, white, and blue clothing ready for a night of fuckery. Of course, I am the hostess of this nonsense.

My cousin and I make lots of food, like always.

Lots of hotdogs, hamburgers, potato salad, a cute USA cake, and lots of other shit. Everyone loves how good my USA cake is that I made. And everyone, of course, gobbles up every bit of my cousin’s potato salad. She makes the best potato salad.

We all eat and laugh and have a good time drinking and having fun. My friends decide it’s a great time to start a little dance party in my living room. And I join in on the fun. We all catch a good buzz and decide to pull out a bong and get lit.

We continue to party until it’s 7pm and decide it is a good time for fireworks! We’re all nice and drunk and ready for a good time. We see and hear other people setting off their fireworks and love the feeling of the American spirit in the air. People hooting and hollering for ‘Merica.

My boyfriend starts by taking all the fireworks and setting them all up on the ground to set off. I sit back with my glass of wine with my girlfriends and watch as my man lights all the shit on fire for us. Of course, boys gotta play stupid and run through the fountain fireworks. But, we all just laugh and tell them not to set themselves on fire.

After a while, we start running low on fireworks.

My boyfriend hands us all a bunch of sparklers and a lighter. So, of course, we all screw around and play with our sparklers like idiots. And my best friend, Regina, starts taking as many sparklers in her hands as possible. She also starts going on about being a bisexual in America.

Regina just rambles on and on about patriotism and how she is the most patriotic of all of us there. We tell her to prove how patriotic she is. And she stands up and shouts “Are you ready to be entertained?! I will show you exactly how patriotic I AM!”

This July Fourth is definitely going to be one to remember. Because the next thing Regina does is grabs 3 boxes of sparklers and starts taking off her panties! We all sit back and watch as her girlfriend says “Babe, it’s just July Fourth. You don’t have to prove anything!”

But, Regina insists she needs to show everyone her American heart. She lays on the table in my backyard and throws her legs in the air. We all stare in awe as she shoves handfuls of sparklers up her pussy. We don’t know what to think and just keep watching this trainwreck.

I say “Ay! Bitch! Get your pussy off my table!” Regina just sticks her tongue out at me and laughs.

She has her girlfriend come up to her with a lighter and set every sparkler on fire. Thankfully, the sparklers have really long-handled. So, Regina’s puss-puss won’t get third-degree burns. She laughs and waves her ass all around and says “I am the bringer of patriotism of July Fourth! Call me Sparkler Pussy!”

I just facepalm and say “That is my best friend, ladies, and gentlemen!”

Cum! Have the best phone sex of your entire life! Call me!