Personally, I only consider a “first date” successful if it ends in fucking — sober or half-drunk, it doesn’t matter. Either way, if there’s not enough chemistry for us to fuck after a few hours, I inevitably find myself saying “Next!” Not out loud . . . well, usually not out loud, anyway. That would be rude . . .
That’s what I love about phone sex. Less pretenses, more cutting to the chase. And a little more action doesn’t necessary mean “a little less talk.” Nothing gets me off more than a dirty, horny man (especially if he’s a “stranger”) telling me all the perverted, kinky things he wants to do with me and to me. Oh, and how gorgeous I am, of course!
Sometimes my callers laugh when I refer to our first call as our “first date.” It is a first date, though. Most people think first dates involve taking someone out to some fancy schmancy (and overpriced) restaurant, sitting through a romantic comedy while wishing you were having your teeth pulled out one by one — or enduring some other kind of excruciating torture. I’d do anything to avoid a romantic comedy.*
Now don’t get me wrong — I love phone sex first dates where the proverbial cock isn’t in my ass (i.e., “phanal” as one of my favorite lines from this classic terms it) within a minute, too. Foreplay is my forte, as some of you edging enthusiasts and tease and denial lovers may know. And sometimes, the more I get to know a caller before we “consummate” our new relationship, the better the first time is. You know?
Wanna take me on a first date? Just give me a call . . . I’ll be here. And you know I’ll put on (and then take off) something real special . . . just for you. ♥
xoxo,
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