Sex Jokes: Top 100 Funniest & Sickest Sex Jokes of All Time Part IV

Sex Jokes # 31-40

After hours and hours of research, playing with my clit and laughing out loud, I have finally compiled a list of my top 100 funniest sex jokes lol.

 

 

31.

A young newlywed couple wanted to join a church.

The pastor told them, “We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks.”

The couple agreed and came back at the end of two weeks.

The pastor asked them, “Well, were you able to get through the two weeks without being intimate?”

“Pastor, I’m afraid we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks,” the young man replied.

“What happened?” inquired the pastor.

“My wife was reaching for a can of corn on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there.”

“You understand, of course, that this means you will not be welcome in our church,” stated the pastor.

“That’s okay,” said the young man. “We’re not welcome at the grocery store anymore either.”

 

32.

 What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?

Hold on to your nuts, this ain’t no ordinary blowjob.

 

33.

How do you embarrass an archaeologist?

Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

34.

How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?

As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.

 

35.

What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?

You can negotiate with a terrorist.

36.

What did the sanitary napkin say to the fart?

You are the wind beneath my wings.

37.

What did the O say to the Q?

Dude, your dick’s hanging out.

38.

What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?

Beef strokin’ off.

39.

What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public?

A private tutor.

 

40.

How is sex like a game of bridge?

If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.

 

Stay tuned for Sex Jokes #41-100

 

Phone Sex Chat