Assturbation [ass-ter-bey-shuh n]: the act of self-erotic stimulation of the anus by insertion of an object(s).

Personally, I think anal sex wouldn’t be so taboo if more people indulged in the pleasures of assturbation. Have you ever played with your ass while masturbation? Or are you already an “assturbation addict” like me?

There’s nothing strange or “weird” about enjoying anal play. Anal orgasms — or for men, orgasms from stimulating the “P spot” aka the prostate — are a whole different kind of orgasm.

The casual assturbation-ist might just use their fingers, but I recommend investing in a toy. Try starting small, like using smaller prostate massager before working your way up to a giant suction dildo. And don’t forget the cardinal rule of ass play: you can never have enough lube!

Watching porn can sometimes give a person an unrealistic idea of how anal play works. The best thing is to experiment slowly and safely with what feels good to your body. Rome wasn’t built in a day — and assholes don’t get stretched overnight!

I use water or silicone-based lubricants and silicone toys that are rechargeable. Another fun assturbation toy: anal beads. Is your girlfriend’s or wife’s birthday cumming up? Maybe she’d enjoy a bouquet of dildos instead of roses . . . what do you think?

Even if she’s not an assturbation enthusiast, it doesn’t mean you can’t explore the joys of prostate stimulation solo. You can — and you should. Here are some guidelines I like to follow and are usually advised by other sexperts:

  1. Clean your anus and use gloves. I like to use gloves anyway (even with people I’m already “fluid-bonded” with) because I like how smooth they feel.
  2. ALWAYS Use something with a base — unless you want your assturbation session to end with a trip to the ER.
  3. Breathe and relax. Wouldn’t want a tight sphincter to rain on your assturbation parade, would you??

Phone Sex Kingdom Nicole Burke