Corn Cob Dildo: Anything’s A Dildo… If You’re Brave Enough.

Corn cob dildo! Now that I have your attention, let’s talk about how anything can be a mother fucking dildo. I have tried so many different things. From vegetables to curling irons to bottles of shampoo.

When I was a teen with a hot tight teen pussy I went to the kitchen late at night to look for a snack. And I couldn’t find anything that I wanted but I did find a nice, long corn cob. I looked at it for a minute and then grabbed it and went back to my bedroom. I locked my door to make sure my mom didn’t walk in on me.

First thing I did: rinse the corn cob under hot water to clean it off and warm it up. I then dried it off with my towel and walked to my bed, corn cob in hand. I slipped off my panties and crawled into my comfy bed. Then I held the corn cob up in front of my face and thought about how this would go.

Then I spread my legs and stick the corn in my mouth to get it all wet. I then stick it inside of my teen pussy. It was so bumpy and a little rough but I was so excited to try it. At the time I was too young to purchase a dildo so this would have to do.

I started to pump it in and out of me.

My pussy was feeling REALLY good. I couldn’t believe that a fucking vegetable was making me feel this good. Lying back in my bed, I started to fantasize about fucking Leonardo DiCaprio. Who was one of the teen girl heartthrobs of my generation?

Soon I could feel my pussy start to tense up around the corn. So I started going faster and harder into my pussy. It felt amazing fucking myself like that and soon enough I came. A vegetable made me cum hard and I was taken aback a bit.

And that was the first dildo from anything I had ever tried. Next up is the time I used a curling iron. Well, I was still young, about 19. And I had a brand new curling iron that I spent a lot of money on. It was gold and it was shiny and pretty.

But, the night that I buy it I am just CRAVING dick. And I cannot get the dick out of my fucking mind, it is driving me absolutely banana sandwich. I laid in my bed tossing and turning just thinking about getting pounded by a massive dick. Then I had an epiphany.

My brand new curling iron is long and thick. I could use it to pleasure myself and cum and finally get to sleep. So, I open the plastic casing with a pair of scissors and hold it in my hand. I wield it as if it is a long sword ready for action.

I sit on the floor and stroke the curling iron like I would a cock.

Pulling my panties down, I lie back on the floor and spread my legs. I fling my panties across the room and spit on my fingers and spread it on my pussy. Then I take the big curling iron and start to push it inside of me. Wow, it is so thick!

I pump it in and out of me as fast as I could because I wanted to cum so bad. And within a couple of minutes, I SQUIRT. That’s right! The curling iron made me squirt on my bedroom floor.

I can’t believe it. Nothing had ever made me squirt before and I thought I had peed but nope. The fluid was on the curling iron as well and was a little milky. What a pleasant surprise.

And as for the shampoo bottle I had mentioned earlier? Well, it seems that shampoo bottles will not fit into my pussy. I am pretty tight and I can’t ever seem to get a big shampoo bottle inside of me. And that is one reason why I cannot even fist myself.

My pussy is far too tight. Honestly!

Like cheap phone sex? Give me a call! We can fuck however you like!