If you’d told me even just a year ago I’d be hearing pregnant sex stories from my baby sister, I wouldn’t have believed you.
Last week, my little sister called me for an adult chat to tell me some BIG news: 1) she was pregnant and 2) her pregnant sex stories! My precocious (and sexy) baby sis presents as a quiet, bookworm-ish type to the outside world. Only me (and her husband and her baby daddy) know what a freak she REALLY is!
When I went to visit her last summer, my sister revealed her recent birth control hiatus. She told me it was permanent, and that she’d been planning it for quite awhile. I wasn’t totally shocked. In fact, it made perfect sense to me. My only question was: who was she was going to get to father her child??
As I’ve mentioned before, her husband is closer to “impotent sissy” than “stud.” She laughed when I (somewhat timidly, more baffled-ly) asked who was the sperm donor and quickly assured me it wasn’t her husband. It was the handsome, wealthy black man she’d been seeing, the virile bull who’d been training her husband alongside her for months now.
I asked her how far along she was. She told me she wasn’t 100% sure, but somewhere around 3 weeks. Apparently she’d downloaded some app on her phone to “track her pregnancy.” However, she quickly changed topics to how much sex she’d been having since her hormones started going crazy.
“I want it all day, all the time. The food cravings are nothing compared to how much I’m craving something inside me, my next orgasm. Is that bad, Aileen?”
I laughed and told her, no way, of COURSE that wasn’t “bad.” It was totally natural.
Call my personal sex hotline for more details on this juicy new gossip!!