Fake Pussy Masturbation, Share Your Thoughts with Me

Fake pussy masturbation is cool or Nah?  Over the years, just when I thought I saw it all, I realized there is more to see.  I love my dildos, clit ticklers, and suckers!  When I size up a toy, I’m looking for girth, texture, flexibility, shape, and other unique features.  I’m struggling to understand the male mind when it comes to these pocket pussies.  Hell, I don’t understand men who prefer ass over pussy either, but that conversation is for another day.  

Fake pussy masturbation, is it like a real twat?  Is that pocket pussy wet gradually or do you have to lubricate it?  I’m a self-cleaning oven. I come with heat, and humidity naturally.  These fake pussy thingamajigs are textured and look like a vagina.  A dildo looks like a penis but doesn’t compare to one. Let me not speak for all women.  I’m a nympho and cum slut, I just like dick.  It doesn’t matter if it is big, small, skinny or GIRTH CITY! Give me the D!

Enough of being a Karen, this is about you.  

There isn’t even a common name for fake pussy.  Is there some sort of stigma to it?  Are there not enough brands endorsing Masturbation Breaks?  Please, someone help me.  I’m confused, to why I can’t come up with one name for it other than fake pussy!  I love pocket pussies, torso dolls, Backdoor Betty’s, vivid raw fuck holes, doggy style vibrating pussy and ass machines, Fleshlights, pumps, and enhancer toys for men!  I get so excited to hear you guys tell me about which ones you love most.  

I’m not a fan of my dildo vibrating while inserted.  A guy wants to feel her heartbeat from down yonder.  There has got to be more to it than a tight wet hole to play in.  Fake pussy does have some advantages, they are cheaper than a date, don’t talk, and won’t ever get pregnant.  Your fake pussy will never tell you she has a headache.  She’s an ignorant bitch if she denies you sex for a headache that isn’t a migraine.  Oxytocin and dopamine are released when you bust one.  So, if she would rather take an aspirin, know that you haven’t been knocking her socks off.  This leads me to believe that fake pussy has the upper hand when it comes to sexual performance anxiety.  You can’t disappoint a piece of silicone or plastic.  The bitch ain’t got no feelings.  

This article is not for those of you who crave intimacy.  

This is for those of you who want the mechanics and the pleasure without the hassle.  I masturbate, so that I don’t have to play mind games of going hot and cold or invoking a bit of pain to follow up with pleasure upon my mate.  You see, Tug-a-War or Snatch-A-Heaux can be draining.  Sometimes, you wanna skip past all the drama and shenanigans straight to ecstasy.  

OMG!  Did you realize they are making these things with lips that move more?  The labia and vulva were just for a show before, but these new aged fake pussy cats are coming with suction around the entry that quiver.  So, you aren’t just getting suction on the inner cervix, but a bit of kegel action in varying spots throughout the fake pussy.  Yes, that kegel action is to die for isn’t it?  Very few young girls utilize this function.  Doing it only unconsciously doesn’t always help both of us bust.  I giggle and do it.  I sneeze and do it.  Then I learned how to do it on my own.  Using that master grip action to knead and roll your scrotum.  

Tell me, my darlings!  

Are those fake pussy masturbation breaks exhilarating?  Do you hit the bottom and have that same bounce-back action as hitting a woman’s uterus?  Is there that little hump you must get over to get to the G-spot in there?  Please, someone talk to me!  I’m dying to get all of the deets!  I have a pussy, and know what it is like to be stroked really good, but don’t have a clue of what it is about that juice box that you can’t get enough of that makes you sweat and shiver  

Talk to me phone sex and masturbation breaks!  I want to hear all about your toys; especially fake pussy!  The confession booth is now open.  I’ve already made mine in Jill Off Instructions Done My Way, it’s time to hear yours!

 

Phone Sex Kingdom Nicole Burke


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